E Commerce Sites and DevelopmentSocial Media and Social ListeningSearch Engine OptimisationContact South West Web Marketing

Quotation and Enquiry Form

Want a FREE quotation? Leave us your name and telephone number and a few details.. we will get straight back to you.

Email From:*

Name:

Tel:

Enquiry:

Follow our Tweets! We offer FREE SEO and Online Marketing Advice, just click here Follow Us On Twitter...

Contact South West Web Marketing Some Spooky (And Silly) Top 11 Tips To Keep Those Pesky Spiders Away From Your Online Dating Site For Halloween

Over the years I have made a habit of rattling on about search engine best practices to taking shortcuts designed to trick search engines into trusting that an online destination is something it is not. So this Halloween I have decided to produce an antithetical essay to my digital morals and marketing beliefs by way of a parody and embrace the very dark side of search engine spoofs.

Spooky Google Spiders!

Fear of spiders? Not a problem. There are many ways to keep those unwanted arachnids from crawling through your white label dating site content.

1. For starters, why not avoid using visible text on your website? Embed as much content as possible in the images and pictures. Better yet, why not make your site into one big splash page that appears to scroll to infinity and beyond. Also, make certain that the imagery loads as slowly as possible. Consider yourself lucky that you will be able to streamline your web metrics around paid search campaigns and not worry about those pesky organic referral terms [not provided] by Google anymore. Keeping spiders out of your content is your first step toward complete search engine invisibility.

2. If your site is text heavy, consider using dropdown and/or pop-up boxes for navigation. Configure these with Flash or have them require JavaScript actions to function.... mmm lovely! If possible, put the rest of your web content exclusively into frames. Designing a website in such a manner is such a good way to keep all those bad robots out of your website.

3. When it comes to URL structures, try to include as many ampersands, plus signs, equal signs, percentage signs, session IDs and other dynamic parameters as possible in your multifaceted, splendidly deep file structure. That way, your website will be made up of really long URL strings that can confuse humans and spiders alike.

4. Even better, add filters and internal site search functionality, metrics tags, and other superfluous attributes to your URLs, so just to keep the search engines guessing about your website structure. Get ready to burn your site’s crawl equity to the floor while watching your bandwidth spend soar, when you wrap your site up like a mummy with this brilliant navigational scheme.

5. If you really want to turn your website into a graveyard for search engine spiders, consider using completely unnecessary redirects on as many different URLs as possible, taking multiple hops along the way. Combine permanent and temporary redirects with soft 404 errors that can keep your content alive in search indices forever. Make certain to build in canonical tag conflicts, XML sitemap errors, perpetual calendars and such, reveling in the knowledge that you will never have to waste precious development time fixing broken links again!

6. Content creation budget got you all depressed? Build in new economic efficiencies by using the exact same content across as many domains as your budget can cope with. Invest in machine-generated content instead of having to listen to those troublesome user reviews. Make “Spamglish”and "Gibberish" the official language of your website.

7. And since you don’t have to worry about looking at what keywords Google allows to send traffic to your Frankensite, feel free to target irrelevant keywords on as many pages as possible... fill your boots!

8. Additionally, try to keep all the title tags exactly the same on the critically important pages within your site. Spiders don’t have good eyesight – sometimes you have to shout to get their attention.

9.Consider keyword stuffing as a way to make certain that the search engines understand precisely what your site is all about. If you don’t have room to stuff unnecessary contextual redundancies into your web content, consider using hidden text that flickers like a ghost when users mouse over what looks like dead space.

Still not convinced you can hide your site from the search engines this Halloween? Well break out the big guns my friends, because we’ve got some link building treats you will love.

10. If your ultimate goal is to bury a domain name for all eternity, make certain that you participate in as many link farming free-for-all sites as possible. When you get a chance to do so, go ahead and “splog” other’s guest books and forums. In addition to buying site-wide text links, demand that your backlinks be placed in the footers. While you’re at it, sell a similar “service” to others.

11. Consider hiding some links in places that surprise visitors and always embrace bad linking neighborhoods. You know the type of sites I’m talking about… they’re the spooky ones and the non-paranormal that a business person would avoid.

Have a wonderful Halloween this year, with the knowledge that you too can make a website completely disappear! Or you can be sensible and totally ignore but hopefully it has made you smile...

Tags: Marketing Strategies, Business Directories, Content Marketing

.......................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................

Talk To Us About iPhone And iPad Applications Other Services from South West Web Marketing...

Our services include Search Engine Optimisation, Online Advertising, Resources, Twitter, Facebook, Tourism, Web Design, E Commerce, Email Marketing, Link Building, Content Marketing, Affiliates, Google and Adwords, Mobile Retailing, Social Listening, Marketing Strategies, SEO and Website Translation, Viral Marketing and pretty much anything "webby" you can think of.